Friday, June 6, 2014

This Cat is Freaking Evil!

I said at the end of the last blog that I would tell you what happened when Freaky Cat met a little white fluff ball named Brandi. But I thought maybe I should introduce Freaky Cat a bit more first.

Like I said, the kids had named her Arwen, but except for the pointy ears, she bore little resemblance to her elf-queen namesake. I called her ‘Freaky Cat’ and she reigned in our home for about three years. 

There are some things that cats do that annoy their owners, but these are just the nature of the beast. If you take a cat into your home, you need to be aware of normal cat behaviour, and if you don’t think you can put up with it – don’t get a cat!

Freaky Cat was a normal kitten. She and her siblings (Aragorn, Legolas, Sarafina, and Bob - the kids let me name the last one) would chase each other around the house, and sometimes they would knock things over. We let them get away with that, because kittens are cute. Besides, most of our breakable ornaments were broken by the first few cats we had. 

Normally, kittens settle down when they are about a year old. We get them ‘fixed’, and they become fat, lazy housecats who love to snuggle, and that is a good thing.

But when Freaky Cat was two, and we had long since given away the other kittens from that litter, she was still acting like a kitten. A kitten on steroids.She didn’t just scratch the furniture. She devoured it.

It seemed at the time that she had a personal vendetta on me. Other cats would get off the table as soon as I started to reach for the water spray bottle. Not Freaky Cat. She would just sit down on the table, scrunch up her face while being squirted, and then lick herself.

 I tried adding lemon juice to the water, and then vinegar. She would just scrunch her face a little more, and wait for me to get up. If it took me awhile to get up, she would sit on the table and lick her butt. Evil, pure evil, I say! As soon as I was up, she would run away.

Freaky Cat was also the most destructive cat we ever had. Her favourite game was to knock things off shelves. Especially breakable things. I think she enjoyed the satisfying crash when things hit the floor. When she wanted me to get up in the morning to feed her, she would jump up on the dresser, and just start batting at things while maintaining eye contact with me. 

We have one of those tall lamps with three glass shelves in the living room. I had a pretty little porcelain vase on the top shelf. I don’t know what I was thinking, silly me! She knocked it onto the floor. It made a lovely crashing sound on the laminate flooring. Later, I put a cute little wooden vase on the top shelf. She knocked it down. On the way to the floor, it hit the bottom glass shelf and shattered it.

She also stole socks. Seriously. My socks are in the top drawer. She would open the bottom drawer with her paws, and jump into it.  From there, she could open the top drawer, grab a pair of socks in her mouth, and run off to hide them. She would never perform this trick with a camera rolling.

Do you believe me now, that this cat was evil? She was just lucky that she was so cute, and that Hubby and I are such softies when it comes to cats.

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